Punishment Time?
Today finds me in a really difficult place...if I keep my word I need to punish my Son for reacting to a bad situation, if I break my word then I'm setting a bad precedent with him.Last night as I was finally on my way home from work, I got a call from TB. She demanded that I go and get my Son at after-school care because she was stuck in traffic because she had run out of gas. Yes, that's right....SHE RAN OUT OF GAS....during rush hour...in a construction zone...with the nearest gas station more than a mile away from where she was.
So I diverted from where I was and went and got my Son. Needless to say he was surprised to see me, but happy that we got to spend some extra time together. As I was taking him back to TB just before his bed time, he tells me that he's been keeping his end of the deal we made last week. I asked him which deal we made and he reminded me that he and I were going to cook together if he went all week without giving his mother a hard time about anything.
I should have seen the warning flags.
When we arrived at TB's...the first thing said is "you do know that this replaces your night with him tomorrow." To which both my Son and I said "why?" at the same time. Apparently in TB-Land, bailing her ass out of a bad situation by helping keep my Son from feeling abandoned is the same as spending pre-planned parenting time with him. While I wasn't happy about it, I agreed...sometimes it's just better to give in and avoid having to talk to her...after all, I'll see him Thursday night and I have him all weekend, then I have him from Tuesday night until Friday at dinner time because of Thanksgiving...so trading Tuesday for Monday wasn't that big a deal. To me...to my Son it apparently was the same as being told that he couldn't see me at all.
This morning he started punishing TB by refusing to do anything that he was supposed to...he didn't want to get up...he didn't want to get dressed...he threw his breakfast dishes across the kitchen (breakfast still on the dishes at the time)...and he refused to talk to me on the phone to try and get him to calm down a bit.
On one hand she deserves everything that she's getting...on the other hand, we had a deal and he broke his side of it. I'm torn between punishing my Son by taking away the cooking time we were going to have and letting him keep it because he's just reacting to something that TB did and he's only 8...
Maybe the next couple of days will bring clarity on my next step...until then, try to enjoy the view before you....I'll be trying to enjoy my own...
posted by Mr. G @ 11/14/2006 08:24:00 AM
Comments: 3
